THANKSGIVING 2011...

Today is Thanksgiving, November 24, 2011.  I’ve looked back at my writings to see what I had to say on special occasions like Easter, Fourth of July, Christmas, and Thanksgiving.

On Thanksgiving Day 2009, I wrote in one of my blogs about my concerns of the day.  In general, what I said then still has relevance today.   Back then we were experiencing the “Great Recession,” and today our Nation still isn’t back on its feet, the world economy is still stalled , our involvement in Iraq is winding down, but we are still mired in Afghanistan, and the political mess in Washington is ongoing. 

 Sounds sort of bleak doesn’t it?  And yet, like then, I have many reasons to be grateful.

I’m Grateful that I am blessed with a wonderful wife!

I’m Grateful that my state of health is good!

I’m Grateful for my happy relationships with family & friends!

I’m Grateful that we are back in California and better able to  enjoy our grandchildren!

I’m Grateful that we are living an abundant life!

I’m Grateful that each day is filled with Joy!

I’m Grateful that I am alive and privileged to experience another day of Life!

That is my “short list” of personal gratitude.  In addition to these areas of my life, everyday I experience wonderful moments of happiness: 

Taking an early morning walk in the neighborhood; The taste and aroma of my first cup of green tea;  Sitting quietly in my Sunroom/Office with my thoughts;  Watching people in the shopping center;  Writing in my Blog;  Researching on the Internet and letting it take me on a wonderful journey of discovery;  Small talk with my Soul Mate;  Listening to Classical Music;  Reading a great novel;  Taking photos at the beach;  Driving my SUV up into the mountains.

While our economy still appears to be on “life support”, we have recovered from economic downturns in the past and moved on to extended periods of prosperity! World economies are always in flux, and yet free trade continues to expand. The Democrats and Republicans appear to be gridlocked, but in the past they have worked together in a bipartisan way.  Wars continue to be fought, but more and more people are seeking peaceful resolutions to conflicts.

I'm grateful that I live in a country that has faced great challenges in the past (World War II, Communism, The Great Depression), and triumphed over all of them! I'm thankful that I'm a citizen of the United States. Our politics are often messy and corrupt, but I hold the "trump card"....I can still vote! Public pressure has curtailed a war in the past, and that type of citizen action appears to be working again! I'm hopeful that "new" national and world leaders will step forward and take up the banner of Change.  

So….while I can only have a limited effect on national and international matters, I can have a real impact at the  “grassroots” level.  I can start with improving my own attitude and behavior, being grateful for my life now, and living in such a way that I add value to those around me.  I can try everyday to live and practice one of Mahatma Gandhi’s quotes:  “Be the change you want to see in the world.”  

  

Happy Thanksgiving 
From Larry & Paula Githens

LOOKING BACK INTO THE FUTURE....

As I was looking back over a years worth of past posts, it's hard to believe that we have come full circle back to November.  My post of 11-3-2010 titled "Seasons of My Life," was written around the lyrics of a famous Frank Sinatra song..."Oh, it's a long, long while from May to December..." " But the days grow short when you reach September..."  "Oh, the days dwindle down to a precious few...September, November...."  It brought to mind the changing seasons of the year, and the similarity of our "Seasons of our Life."....  "Seasons"in my 7th decade, which I refer to as the autumn of my life.


Back on that November 3rd day of 2010, I was looking out my office window at the beginnings of seasonal change in Prescott Valley, Arizona, with the leaves falling and the aspens turning a bright yellow.  The nights were getting quite cold, and the days were much shorter.  However, more than seasonal changes were in the air, as we had decided to return to California, and we were right in the midst of planning, packing, and researching where our next home might be.


History repeats it self!  As I type this new Post on November 4, 2011, I'm looking out my office window at our first seasonal rain.  The trees are still green, except for the small ornamental Pear tree which has been dropping red and gold leaves for two weeks.  Daylight Savings time ends this Sunday so the sun will be down around 5:00 PM, and my "internal clock" will be screwed up for a few days. 


While we have loved our home..."The Casita"... these past 10 months, we have come to realize that there are features which aren't entirely pleasing to us.  Such as the one bathroom (you "older guys" will understand that  challenge), excessive traffic noise, a condo too small for us (about 900 sq. feet), little or no storage areas, a washer/dryer not inside the unit, and a carport not a garage.  It has many positive points:  nice kitchen, floor plan flows well, wood floors and plantation shutters, and located in an attractive development.


So...our lease will be up on January 9th next year, and I am beginning to research neighborhoods in San Diego County that will better meet our needs.  We anticipate that this "looking" process will take several months, and after January we'll go "month-to-month" so there isn't any real pressure to get out there and beat the woods, so to speak. 
It is our intent that our next home will be just what we want, and we will "settle down" for many years to come.  At least until 2019 or 2020 when I'll get the "7 year itch"again!  ( Lived in Arizona from 2004 to 2011..).  I'm fairly certain that won't happen.



Ah...now there's a vision...sitting at the beach, with our new home nearby.  And as the song goes..."these precious days I'll spend with you..."



We will live each day to its fullest, and never wait to do what we dreamed about in the Spring of our lives!








Larry and Paula

IT IS TIME FOR A FEW RANTINGS....

There is nothing like a blank page to cause you pause!  It's just there, clean and white, with nothing on it!  That is the way my blog post box is looking right now.  The box, which is about 5" x 10", is designed so that you can select how the font will appear....the look, color and  size of the type, and even the background color if white is too stark for you.  You can also insert images  such as clip art and photos to dress your blog up a bit.  
Right now I'm typing in a font called Verdana Bold.  For a more exotic look, you can switch to Italic (which is leaning to the right)...or you could change the color of the type to red, or blue....but I'm going to stick with black in the Verdana Bold.  It just sorta depends on your mood.  I'm not feeling "black", but it shows up nicely on the white background.
WELL HOW'S THAT FOR RAMBLING?

So here I am trying to write something...anything...that will make some sense and sound almost intelligent.  As you can tell, I do some of my best writing without having any idea what the hell I'm going to say!  (By the way..I don't have any cats, I don't smoke a pipe, I don't have a beard, and I don't write on a typewriter!)  I know... then why did I select that particular clip art?  Because I like it!


NOW FOR SOME RANTINGS!


So...what's up with me?  Again, it seems that there have been long stretches of time where I've written next to nothing in this blog.  Writing is therapy for me, and it's time to unload what has been going on in my head and heart during these past few months.  Permit me to vent (they call it rant) a bit, and know that I don't expect that all who read this will agree with any of it.  That's okay.  One thing hasn't changed in this country....freedom of speech!  So I invite all of your comments..I'd love to hear from you.  Now some political ranting!


 I'm finally realizing that I am mad as hell about the way politics is being played out in our country.  Talk about a "do nothing Congress"...this has to be one of the worst in history.  Both political parties have contributed to the gridlock we have been witnessing.  The nation has watched while the Congress has wasted months on the Debt issue, when they should have been focused on creating jobs and helping the unemployed to get on their feet again.  I understand that the Republicans and their Tea Party buddies are trying to block every piece of legislation that would help the President get reelected in 2012.  Yes, but at the same time the Democratic Party looks like a disorganized group of wimps who keep throwing in the towel.  
President Obama, who I voted for, has had difficulty finding a "backbone!"  He has been politically naive in his belief that bipartisanship will get what he wants.  Big banks, Wall Street, and powerful financial corporations are only focused on insuring that their profits continue to rise!  Only in the last few weeks has the President taken his message to the people about how to get our economy going again, bypassing the Congress and the Washington morass.

My level of frustration peaked a few weeks back, and then I was given the opportunity to express my First Amendment Rights in a "concrete" way.  The Occupy Wall Street demonstrations gave birth to similar marches throughout America, including Occupy San Diego.  I joined the marchers on two separate occasions in downtown San Diego.  The turnouts were large, nonviolent, well organized, and a cross section of people of all ages, classes and ethnic backgrounds.   I was impressed by the number of folks obviously over the age of 50; it almost looked like a AARP convention!  They were not a "bunch of hippies", radicals, and "those just looking for a handout", as characterized by the media.  They were like me...pissed off, fed up with Congress, sick of the politicians, angry at the unconscionable greed of Big Banks, and worried about what the future holds in a World where corporations are more important than people!


Whew!  I think I feel a little bit better.  But the challenges remain, and we can't just put our heads in the sand and hope that somebody else will solve them.  All of us need to stay informed about what is going on in America, or one day we will wake up to a political and economical result we don't like.  Whether you are of the Right or the Left politically, you can't rely on the politicians to do what's best for you.  They operate exclusively in their own self interest, and are more concerned about getting reelected with special interest money than dealing with the very serious problems facing our Country.  But of course, you know this, because the favorable rating for Congress right now is 9 %, which I believe is the lowest in recent history!


I'm an Independent and have been one for years.  I've voted for Conservatives and I have voted for Liberals.  Party affiliations don't impress me one way or the other.  While I lean toward Progressive ideas, I'm prepared to listen to Conservative arguments, and have changed my mind about positions I've held dearly over the years. Hopefully my political views will continue to adapt to the realities of the day.


One thing that won't change, is my strong belief that America...even with  its present faults...is still a great Nation and we are a great people!  

  









  












  

RAMBLINGS OF LATE...

Been awhile since I've taken the time to write.  Busy with the worlds problems (watching too much TV news), busy assisting Paula with her wonderful business...Body Energetics (we just produced a monthly  Newsletter), busy with everyday things (cooking, planning, thinking...), all of which should not be an excuse for not writing!


Lately, I've found myself thinking too much!  Has that ever happen to you?  You know that peculiar process we have developed as humans somehow believing that all that thinking will make a difference in our lives, and by extension, it will have an impact on the world at large.  If I just gave a situation/problem enough rational, reasoning, reflective thought, I'd solve it and be at peace.


Well at my age I should know better!  Maybe...but until you learn a lesson, it will keep coming back to look you right in the eye.  Learn that lesson, and now you have time for all the others.  And I can tell you the lessons don't stop when you reach 40 or so....they just become different.


Pardon me but I digress! (Ramble)  I was talking about thinking, but a special kind of thinking.  Thinking that is circular, winding and not leading anywhere.  It pulls you in like a "roundabout" in Rome, and you just can't seem to find your way out.  It doesn't lead to any conclusions, but just keeps you locked up "thinking" about the same issues time and again.


No...the thinking I'm talking about is "Creative Thinking."  In some ways it isn't even thinking, but more of just being quiet and listening to the silence. Some would refer to this as meditation.  But I'm not sitting there counting my breaths in and out, nor concentrating on a Mantra.  I am just being with the silence, and observing what takes place in my head.


My creative thinking usually occurs  early in the morning while I'm sitting in the sunroom.  There are few distractions, I haven't checked the news on the Internet, and the outdoor sounds are muted.  I'm seated comfortably on the couch with a pen and 11 x 14" sketch pad near by for notes.  My eyes are partially closed and I'm breathing easily.  I just let the thoughts, any thoughts come to mind, and see where they lead.  I'm not working on the solution to a problem, nor am I seeking an answer to anything.  I'm just "being" in the present, and letting my "thinking" take me where it will.


This experience is a delicious time of rapture, and always brings me Peace.   I always seem to come out of the session feeling calm, peaceful, and alive. Ideas have come to me almost every time.  Ideas about all areas of my life... new insights, questions answered, paths to follow, and ways to be.


Well enough about thinking...my brain is mush!  I'm going to just press the Publish Post button...without thinking...and say goodnight. 

  




Larry

AFTER BIRTHDAY THOUGHTS...What Things Do I Want In My Life Now!

Oh no...another birthday!  Well that's not the way I really feel.  It may sound a little crazy, but in the last 10 years or so, I have been looking forward to being a year ol...younger.  How does that work?  Well...for those of you who know me, I don't believe I'm getting older...just more "Mature!"  


Age is a convenient chronological label that insurance companies, governmental agencies, fashion designers, and the media like to hang around our necks.  It's a way to categorize various groups of people, so that we will believe all folks in that class are generally the same.  You know...old people, the retired, Senior citizens, the Elderly, Pensioners, Over-the-Hill crowd, geezers and Old Farts!  


Age isn't chronological...it is more about your attitude toward the process of "running up the numbers!" If you are one who accepts the conventional "wisdom" that anything over 55 is old, you'll soon be acting and looking older.  You'll imagine that you have the latest disease, start comparing symptoms with friends, and work yourself into a real depression. You will start to believe that your youth has gone...and it's all down hill until the end!


Well that's not for me!  There are an increasing number of folks who believe, like I do, that 65 and over is the "beginning" of a Second Adulthood, an Age of Mastery, (per Gail Sheehy in New Passages), not the "end of Life."  


I just celebrated 72 years on this planet, and most days I feel and act about "50 few."  It's all in your head and how you think about things...actually how you think about everything in your life.  Thoughts are powerful.  Good thoughts will bring you good; bad thoughts will bring you loads of problems.


So...the big question is:  What Now? What am I thinking now?   What are the primary objectives/intentions/goals/ambitions that I desire at this time in my life?  What are the most important things that get me up in the morning, get my "motor running," and excite me...(besides my lovely wife.)!


I believe I've come up with a tentative list of 6 areas in my life that I'm focusing on for now.  Tentative, because one can always change your mind.  6 areas, rather than 1 to 5, because that's how the math worked out!  This isn't necessarily a "Bucket List", but it could be the bones of such an inventory of what I'll like to do before I exit the planet.


Here they are in total; I'll try to explain them in detail in the body of this post.  
                WHAT THINGS DO I WANT IN MY LIFE NOW!


         To Live An Abundant Life!
         To Travel The World!
         To Live My Life in Good Health!
         To Enjoy Wonderful Relationships With Family and Friends!
         To Engage In Life Long Learning!
         To Live Everyday To Its Fullest!


To live an abundant life doesn't mean having lots of money and riches, nor great personal wealth, nor living in large homes, driving fancy cars, and having an unlimited supply of "adult toys." I've had a modest amount of these things through my life, and I can tell you that they were never the answer to happiness and personal fullfillment.  If you believe that having lots of money is the answer, check with someone who's been rich, and then lost everything, and if their truthful, they will tell you that riches are not the answer!  


Right now...my life is abundant!  We've simplified our lifestyle, we've limited unnecessary purchases (needs not wants), we don't use credit cards, we are living within a reasonable budget, and we save for large expenditures.  We don't have any debt (except our cars which will be paid off next year), we don't have a mortgage (we rent year to year), we are close to our "adult children" and grandkids, we are both in good health, and Life Is Good!


To travel the World has been a long term desire for me.  With the exception of Mexico, Canada and Japan (in the military), my travel experiences worldwide have been few.  We hope to change that next year with a planned trip to the United Kingdom and the Republic of Ireland.  My wife's ancestors came from Ireland, and my father's people are from Wales.  Hopefully, that will be the first of many trips abroad. 
We've created a "travel fund,"  and are seeking "cheap" and creative ways to travel.  ( Your ideas would be appreciated.)  


While my overall health is good, I want to maintain it into the future.  I work out at 24 hr Fitness, try to eat reasonably well, plan to get back into biking, and try to laugh everyday.... but my favorite exercise is walking.  No complicated equipment (slip on your walking shoes), step out the door, and start putting one foot in front of the other!  Our neighborhood is perfect as it has a variety of hills and level areas.  Walking calms the mind, lowers your blood pressure, helps you to breathe, provides you with lots of the "sunshine vitamin" (Vitamin D), and improves your attitude.  Getting out in nature is a wonderful tonic, and it sorta puts everything in perspective.  Birds sing, the wind blows, trees branch out, and the grass continues to grow.  My little worries are insignificant compared to the grandeur of our Earth!


Enjoying wonderful relationships should probably be in the number 1 spot of this list.  Without close relationships with family and friends our life would certainly be unfullfilling and tragic.  As a "social animal" we need close and frequent contacts with others and those we love.  Meaningful contact...not emails, texting, short phone calls...(they have their place), but person to person conversations, face-to-face, looking into each others eyes, and making a real connection.  Simple talking seems to become rather quaint and uncommon in this "Age of Information."  I hope that dialogue between two or more people isn't destined to disappear and somehow be replaced by an electronic device!


Life Long Learning has been a great joy to me.  While I haven't taken any additional college work beyond my Masters Degree, I've continued to read a great deal....especially in the classics, geography, history, politics, current events, writing and photography.  Since 1995, when I purchased my first computer, the Internet has opened up a "cornucopia"of information that I feast on daily.  In the last few years, I've limited the time I spend on "surfing the net," as it's quite easy to lose track of time.  I've established a rule for myself that all of my computer work...surfing, emails, writing, keeping up with friends...is done at home.  When I go out to Starbucks or places like that, I'm seeking interesting conversations with people, not to interact with a computer screen or cell phone.  You can learn so much through conversations, if you listen twice as much as you talk!


So...my goal is to live every day to its fullest.  That doesn't mean I'm necessarily trying to "multi-task" or fill every hour with some activity.  It's more about "quality" than "quantity!"  It's about choosing to do things that I enjoy....reading, writing, walking, talking, listening to music, cooking, watching people....and just "being," if you know what I mean.  If at the end of the day I feel good about what I did in general, then I'm living to my fullest!




See You Down The Road...

          















   




  

AN EASTER WISH...

Another year has past so quickly, and now I'm realizing that tomorrow is Easter!  I'm wanting to come up with a post for this years Easter celebration, and I am looking back on my post for last year, hoping I could somehow improve on its "elegance", borrow a few lines, (I believe they call it plagiarism Larry), and commit literary theft on myself!
After a great deal of hand wringing, I concluded that this bit of slight-of-hand would not go unnoticed by those legions of devoted followers of my Blog, and they would probably go leave me high and dry on the internet.  (By the way, thanks to my wife and "several" friends for continuing to subscribe to my "Ramblings!")


At any rate, I'm still staring at the "blinking cursor" in front of me, and trying to put some thoughts down on this page.
Let's see....how about looking up a definition of Easter to get the juices flowing.  As you might expect, there are hundreds of pages on the internet on how people define Easter.  I think they generally fall into two "camps"...those of a religious bent, and the "Easter Bunny"people.  The first group defines Easter as "a Christian festival held in the Spring, to celebrate the Resurrection of Jesus Christ after his crucifixion."  Whereas, the "Bunny Rabbit" folks speak of colored Easter eggs, candy for the kids, and the importance of going out to buy new Easter outfits for the family.  Oh...and also the requirement to show up at church for Easter Sunday to show how "religious" they are!  (Do you get where I'm going with this..?)


Now I must admit that I'm probably more "Spiritual" than "Religious" at this stage in my life.  And, while I attend a church on a fairly regular basis, during the past 60 years or so, I have not exactly been a religious zealot!  Over those years, I've sampled what most of the main denominations have had to offer.  A bite or two of Protestantism (Baptist, Methodist, Presbyterian, etc.) in my formative years.  A brief flirtation with Buddhism while in the Air Force stationed in Japan..circa 1961.  A large helping of Catholicism during my first marriage.  (I now refer to myself as a "recovering Catholic!")  And since 1980, and up to the present, I have attended so called "New Thought" churches like Religious Science and Unity.  But while some think we are "not Christian enough," we do believe in God and the resurrection of Jesus Christ...i.e. Easter!  (Did I sound a bit defensive??)  Though my philosophical roots are in Christianity, I'm not limited by those beliefs.  I study and respect the wisdom and universal truths found in all the world's religions.


Now you probably understand why my Blog is titled Rambling Prose!
So...having written all of the above, what is it I'm really trying to say?  What do I believe about Easter and what does it mean to me?


First off, I do fall into the "camp" that believes in the Resurrection.  Secondly, you would not believe that if you knew how much candy and how many Easter eggs I'll be hiding to entertain my grandkids and myself on Easter Sunday.  Okay...give me a break!
However, there is little doubt in my mind that eggs and bunnies seem to have eclipsed what Easter is all about.  This important religious holiday has been usurped by commercial interest and the mass media who are "devotedly" obsessed with making a buck!


Now....I'm in no position to "preach" to others on this subject, and I won't do that...too much.  However, I'll just say this:  Our national values have become grossly skewed in the direction of the Easter Bunny (color it Commercialism), and away from traditional Christian views held by many of us.  While I don't favor doing away with chocolate candy (which I love), the dyeing of Easter eggs, and skipping Easter supper...I do believe it is time that we emphasize the religious (spiritual) nature of Easter.  We can all hold on to our personal beliefs....you know, freedom of religion and freedom of speech; Born Again versus New Thought, etc., but let us not be confused about the core meaning of Easter, and the positive impact it has had on millions of people throughout the World.


So...on a much lighter note, let me just say this.  Paula and I wish all of our family and friends a Happy Easter.  Have a wonderful and blessed day in your own special ways...and remember to Keep the Peace!

SPRING HAS SPRUNG!

March 20th...the First Day of Spring!  Webster's II New College Dictionary defines Spring as "The season between winter and summer."  Oh boy, that's exciting!  The Thesaurus wasn't much more elaborate with synonyms like:  stem, sprout, start, arise and germinate.  Music to the ears of every horticulturist.
Another term for Spring is the Vernal Equinox (meaning equal night), the date when night and day are nearly the same length.  Surfing the Internet, one can come across all types of interesting facts.  The first day of Spring also marks the beginning of Nowruz, the Persian New Year.  The Sun is positioned directly over the equator...and other such trivia.


To my way of thinking, Spring signifies a time for growth and renewal, a time when many people search for new meanings to their life.  New beginnings, new plantings of ideas, new hopes, and new goals for the coming year.  After turning over the earth, it's a time to plant the flowers, the gardens, the trees and shrubs, and to watch over them carefully, knowing that we will soon see the first sprouts of our efforts.   I recall the many gardens my mother and father tended with care and love.  They knew that every seed would "spring" to life; all they had to do was water and weed to insure that the germination went smoothly.


Spring for me is a metaphor for New Beginnings.  In many ways it is a description of our life at this particular point in time.  Having prepared the way through planning and intention, Paula and I have been transplanted back to the warm soil of California.  We've intentionally uprooted and replanted a "growing plant"...our life together... from the high desert of Arizona to the coastal lowlands of San Diego.  We loosened and dug up the roots we had grown in Prescott, wrapped them lovingly in the burlap of our memories, and brought it all to Rancho Bernardo where we have planted it with care.  We'll carefully  watch over this new transplant, watering and fertilizing it, fully expecting that in time it will grow and blossom in new and exciting ways.


P.S.   Spring has "Sprung"...with lots of wind and rain.  Better to grow and nurture those new plantings.

"MOVING" THOUGHTS...AND OTHER UNRELATED THINGS!

Well...I just can't believe it's been months since I've written anything in my blog.  That's not to say that I have been sitting on my hands.  They have been quite busy in our recent move from Prescott, AZ to San Diego, California.
Initially, they were busy doing research on the internet to locate our next home.  I'm sure I developed carpal tunnel syndrome stroking the keyboard, palming the mouse, not to say anything about eye strain and terminal stress in my shoulders from hutching over my desk.  (But I'm not complaining; we did find a wonderful new place to live in Rancho Bernardo.)


Moving furniture and all our possessions to a "staging area" in the garage keeps your hands moving too...along with every muscle you swear you've never used before. On moving day, your using hands, arms and legs, and bending and stretching limbs that are not especially forgiving, lifting all manner of furniture, over- packed boxes, china, kitchen appliances, BBQ's, tools, computer towers & monitors, and tons of books, into a 26 foot Penske truck, praying that you've measured correctly and accounted for everything, and getting it all inside that "moving box on wheels" so you can  close that truck gate, securing all your worldly possessions in one place!  It's truly a humbling experience!  Humbling because you thought you had accumulated more "things" and "toys" than that; further humbling because you feel stupid for having kept any of these things....most of which you seldom use!


Thanks to the help of family and friends, we had survived the trek across the Arizona/California deserts...much in the fashion of Depression Era travelers...out of a Steinbeck novel... (Okay, I exaggerate.)  Now, all we had to do was to unload our cargo and squeeze it all into our "Casita".  Understand that all of this stuff had previously resided in a 1800 square foot 3 bedroom 2 bath 3 car garage, and was going into a 2 bedroom/1 bath condo which allegedly was "about 1200 square feet."  Also understand, that Casita in Spanish is "little house!"
Needless to say, we have experienced the "mother of all downsizing," and after giving away and selling items we have needlessly hauled around for years, we are in our home!

For those of you who are part of the "Social Media" scene, we will be posting photos of our new place on Facebook.  It's actually quite charming, and we look forward to entertaining family and friends at our new "diggings."








Now..."Ramblings" about other unrelated things.  (Well, what did you expect from a blog titled "Rambling Prose?")


We have been away from California for about 6 years, and I fully expected that it would have undergone some changes.  But I wasn't prepared for what I'm about to discuss. 
 Perhaps it's easier to see when one has been living in an entirely different environment like we have.  Northern Arizona, made up of primarily small towns and rural areas, is significantly different from Southern California.   Life goes on at a much slower pace.  People walk and drive slower, they speak at a slower tempo, they seldom "multi-task, they take their time eating, and they probably have lower blood pressures as a result.  They appear to take more time to talk with each other, (you remember...conversations), they tend to be friendly and neighborly, and for the most part, their children seem to be well adjusted and happy.  ( I guess you understand that there are exceptions to the above.) However, politics and ultra-conservative beliefs are another thing! Will talk about that some other day.


Time for a definition.  Civility:  Politeness, courtesy, good manners, respectfulness, cordial, and pleasant.  Maybe you can see where I'm going with this line of thought.


What has struck me the most since coming back to San Diego is the increased  number of people I run into who are impolite, unfriendly, and down right hostile.  It's expressed in how they view and treat other people; how they recklessly drive their vehicles; how they speak to others, and in general, how they appear to be unconscious of those around them.

You are probably thinking there have always been unhappy and hostile folks around…and you would be right.  During the past 10 years, we as a people have certainly been exposed to a great deal of societal stress:  9-11, terrorism, wars, the Great Recession, mass unemployment, political polarization, 24/7 news coverage…the list goes on.  Those are reasons enough to make folks just a little cranky.  But it seems to go beyond the obvious and is less apparent at first glance.  Something rather "basic" has changed.

Today, not only in San Diego, but throughout our country, basic values of respect toward others is lacking.  Simple kindness seems to be out of vogue and “old fashion.”  A smile and a kind word seems to be viewed with suspicion.  Everyone seems to be in a hurry to get some where, any where, as fast as possible!  

Now…having said all of the above, that is not the case with all people.  There are many who respect the rights of others, who look you in the eye and smile, and who “take time" to really listen to you.  We all like to be “heard” and understood.  Face to face conversations seem to be the exception rather than the rule. 
 Now days folks are “talking” to their cell phones, “listening” to endless music, developing a case of "pink eye"staring at computer screens of all sizes, all the while creating arthritic hands "texting”as they walk across a parking lot, seemingly unaware of the outside world!   So, while we spend hours “communicating”with all manner of electronic devices, little in the way of dialogue...you know, conversation between two or more people...takes place!

What's the answer?  I'm not really sure.  But perhaps we need to push the universal "reset" button, and see if some balance, some equilibrium, can be reestablished in our lives.  No, I'm not proposing a return to pencils and phones with cords, but I believe one can use modern day conveniences and still carry on meaningful relationships with others.  

See you next time.  Love to hear your comments.